Update!

I'm going crazy. It's true. I have an emotional breakdown at least once a week, because I can't keep the stress from getting to me. And it's driving me crazy, cause I know it's ridiculous.

School is the main source, not the wedding. Possibly because school keeps me so busy I barely have time to think about the wedding. The class that's going to kill me? Elang 350. Otherwise known as Basic Editing. And entirely necessary for me to take right now. We have 5 books for that class. 5 textbooks on editing. I have reading from at least two of them every class period, and lately a 2-4 page worksheet to practice what I've read. Not to mention the total of 6 tests in the class. Plus the final. That is 7 tests in a 16 week period. Not fun. Plus 2 or 3 projects. One which I'm already supposed to be working on, but are you kidding me, I haven't had time for that. So, if I die or actually do lose what sanity I have left, you can blame it on this class.

However, there has been one good thing that has come of this high stress level I've been at lately. I see even more how much Jacob loves me. He has been so patient with me(ignoring the fact that he thinks he gets to tickle me every time I get too discouraged) and I feel so bad it seems like I'm incapable of remembering what he's told me to help keep me calm. He truly is the source of my sanity right now. Even when I'm having a hard time, and I'm crying in the middle of campus, I really am still happy. That's something I realized this week. Despite my surface emotions, I have this deep rooted calm, peace, and happiness that doesn't really go away. I know that comes from Jacob, and it's been there since the first time he said "I love you" to me. So, although I may seem to be unhappy and stressed all the time, I really am happy right now. And I can't wait until April 30th when I can be sealed to Jacob for eternity. Nothing sounds better than that to me right now.

As for wedding plans, they're coming along quite nicely. I'm going to have my friend Amanda Campbell do our photography (if you need any pictures taken, check out the link to her photography blog under my blog list) and I met with her on Friday to talk about some ideas and times. My wedding dress is finished. My mom and I went to the ladies house one last time yesterday so she could make sure the hem was right, etc. It is perfect. I loved it before the alterations, but now, I love it even more. I know I'm going to feel beautiful in it, and I'm so excited for Jacob to see me in it. Also, my mom and I have decided how we want to do the centerpieces for the reception, and talked to my dad's cousin about what decoration we're going to rent from her company. We've basically decided on what we'll serve for refreshments, and the biggest reception stuff left to decide will depend on the weather. I want to have it in my parent's backyard, but we'll see if the weather cooperates.

Some exciting things: Jacob and I decided to make our own wedding cake together. I think it will be so much fun. And, if it isn't the most beautiful cake ever, that'll be okay, because we'll know that it's something we did together. Also, we've booked our honeymoon. We're driving up to Seattle and staying in a Bed and Breakfast in town. Best part-- the room we wanted wasn't' available, so they're giving us the slightly bigger and nicer room, for the same price as the other one. How sweet is that?

So, I think that's about it. Now to get back to life, cya.

Winter 2010...what will it be like?

Today was the first day for the new semester....

Can we just fast forward to April 30th please? Because then I would have another semester behind me(having gotten brilliant grades of course) and the wedding would be planned, and all I would have to do is get married! Too bad life doesn't work that way. So here's how it's gonna work this semester:

I'm working in the mornings again. I think 4am missed me. I didn't miss it. Luckily, I think I'll adjust okay. My mind and my body have done this before..so I just have to remember, right? Of course, that doesn't mean I'll avoid having a hard time staying awake in all my classes(today was not a good sign).

As for my classes, can I please murder my CHUM teacher and replace her with a new one. Way to go, not making sure that our book was on the booklist. And now the bookstore doesn't' have it ordered in....and you expect me to do the homework anyway? No thanks. Yeah, I'm pretty sure this will be my very least favorite class of the semester. Boo on you Computers and the Humanities 230, thanks for cramping my enjoyable semester. (Look forward to further complaints of this nature, though don't get me wrong, it will be nice to learn more about InDesign and Photoshop, and review what I haven't used in an eternity)

I also am taking Spanish again this semester. Ugh...Spanish. I'm quite tired of you. And I miss my teacher from last semester because I actually felt like I learned a lot from her. The only good thing about this class is that A. I do like learning a new language, just not all the busy work. And B. This is my second to last class of Spanish...ever, during my career at BYU.

Basic Editing should be an interesting class. We get to keep a blooper log. As in take pictures and document any and all usage or grammar mistakes on posters, signs, blogs, anything. Also, my teacher compared editors to Christ today....it was an interesting analogy, and actually pretty well thought out. I plan to learn a lot in this class. And...she's the teacher over internships, so I'll have to talk to her about that, and other good ways to get some actual experience. I'm contemplating joining a student journal...I'm just not sure I'll have time.

Speaking of time, I'm pretty sure life hates me, because Jacob and I hardly have any time to see each other this semester. Our schedules are pretty much opposites. This will be painful....but perhaps a good thing. Maybe I'll get more studying done. (AKA maybe Jacob will get more studying done, cause I always got my stuff done) But to say the least...I am NOT happy about this. At least I won't be working Sundays anymore though, so that'll be nice to actually spend some time with him on weekends.

So, the only classes I haven't mentioned are my World Lit and English Novel classes. I had World Lit today, and I'm excited for it. It's the second half, and I'm taking it from the same professor I took the first half from last semester. I really like her style, so I'm looking forward to the class. I haven't had my English Novel class yet, but I'm quite sure I will love it. Just one thing...I can't decide if it's a good thing or a bad thing that I've already read at least half of the material for my two literature classes.....hmmmm.

One more note. People my age are getting back from their missions. It makes me feel kind of old. It will be fun to run into some of them on campus. Or at least I hope I'll run into them. This also means that my cousin Brian gets home in approximately 1 month. I love that kid, he's one of my best friends, and I'm super excited to see him!

Okay, I think that's all. Bye.

2010

So, it's the first day of 2010. Wow. Time flies way to fast. So, yesterday I told you all about some of the big things I did last year. Here's a preview for some of the things I am looking forward to this year:

I am going to finish planning a wedding.
I will take out my endowments.
I am getting married to Jacob on April 30th!!!!!
We are going to Seattle(for our honeymoon) it will be my first time there!
I'll start my last year at BYU.


hmm, the list may not be that long, but those are some pretty big things. I'm super excited for this year! It's gonna be great.

P.S. I love my life.