I just finished reading Middlemarch for my English Novel class. At first, the book was really slow. It’s about 800 pages long, and I probably didn’t get drawn into the book until about halfway through. However, once I did get interested, it was really good, and I actually finished it a week before I needed to. Anyway, I thought I’d share some of the thoughts that I’ve gained from this book.One of the main focuses of the book is the fact that within a given community, or other distinction of people, there is always a sort of web, that is to say, everybody is somehow connected. And every person sees this web from a different point of view, so they see things differently. I guess I’ve always agreed with this point, but I’ve started thinking more about the webs I am a part of. I think that so often we get way too focused on our own point of view, and we forget that other people see things in ways that we can’t. The other day I wrote a short post, that I really don’t care if it got ignored because all I was doing was venting. I was really frustrated with some people I associate with on a daily basis, and the fact is that they are still doing some things that really frustrate me. But just now, I’ve realized that their point of view is completely different from mine. They probably have no idea how inconsiderate I think they’ve been lately. And I have no idea what problems and feelings they may be dealing with right now. So just remember, you’re connected to everyone. No matter what you say or do, you affect other people, just like they affect you. And not everyone will see these interactions like you do. So try to see things from the point of view of others before you act.
One of the other things that is a focus in the book is relationships. One of the “books” is actually titled Three Love Problems, so obviously this book talks about this a lot. One thing I learned from this book, or I guess it would be better to say I was reminded of this. When you start a relationship with somebody, whether that be romantic or other, you will always have certain expectations, about the person and about the relationship. Those expectations should never be based on something false, and you shouldn’t ignore anything about you or the other individual when making them. Also, generally your expectations aren’t completely met by the real thing. If things turn out better than you expected, don’t doubt that, just enjoy it. If they turn out to be what you see as worse, don’t focus on your disappointed expectations. Accept the person and your relationship for what they are, and focus on what you can do improve the relationship for both of you. I think we can see all the time that people forget this in our world today. You can see it in the high divorce rate. People dream up these grand expectations of their marriage and their spouse, and then when life gets a little difficult, they turn their backs and run, instead of working towards a new realistic goal. I understand that sometimes it is hard to be let down, but I plan on working harder to accept what comes and make the best of it. Because if you can’t’ accept reality, you’ll only feel worse.
Finally, the book ends with this quote:“for the growing good of the world is partly dependent on unhistoric acts, and that things are not so ill with you and me as they might have been, is half owing to the number who lived faithfully a hidden life, and rest in unvisited tombs” For some reason when I read this quote, it really resounded with me. There are so many people in the world who make a big difference, just by living their lives. Generally they go unnoticed, and they are never recognized for the good they did for the world. But they never expected that or asked for it, and I guess that is what made them so good. In my own life I can think of so many people who’ve made a difference, just by being themselves. Sometimes I can see what someone has done for me, and when that’s the case, I try to thank them for it. But often, it isn’t until many years later that I see what they did for me, and there are some people who I may never fully appreciate in this lifetime. I wish that we could all see the way others influence us, because then maybe we’d all be a little kinder to each other.
I also think it is so important to realize the potential you have to do good for other people. When I realize that I have the ability to make a difference, it makes me feel a lot better about myself. Lately, I’ve had a really hard time recognizing my own value, and feeling like I am at all important in this world. But, in reading this book and thinking about the things I’ve written above, I’ve been able to see things a little more clearly. I have a role to play in this world. If I didn’t, then Heavenly Father wouldn’t have created me. I have people and communities that I am supposed to interact with, and people that I can make a difference to. Every person in this world has a place that no one else could fill. Everyone has an enormous potential for good. All we have to do is recognize that fact. We have to realize that we are not alone in this life, that we can change the lives of others for good, and that there are people that we need to work with to create the relationships that make this life worth living.
Well, that’s it. I realize that these thoughts aren’t very connected, but they’ve been drifting through my mind tonight. I hope that reading this has given you some new thoughts of your own. And if not, oh well. And to those of you who have made a difference in my life, Thank you. Who I am today is in large part a product of those I’ve shared my life with, and I wouldn’t have it any other way
